Please make checks payable to...

Ok, before I start my next crusade, a word or two about mice.

Have you ever been embarrassed when a guest comes over and discovers that your mouse has dirty balls? How many times has it happened to you? How mortifying is it for YOU when a houseguest opens the access panel and scrapes around in there with a fingernail, pen, or whatever, and then snaps everything back in place, brushes off the mousepad, and goes back to surfing?

Don't let it happen to you EVER AGAIN!! Get yourself an optical mouse, sold at fine stores everywhere.

To any of you peripherals manufacturing companies that decide to use this advertising method to sell your optical mice, just drop me an e-mail and I'll give you my address so you can pay me a modest remuneration in exchange for the millions in sales this campaign generates. Actually, if you prefer to pay me with merchandise credit, that would be dandy. I could always use a newer computer.

16 years too late

So, tonight I saw Ordinary People. Yeah, it came out in 1980, thanks, I know. I was 11 then, sue my parents for not taking me to an R rated movie (language). And as I sat there, watching this story unfold, I thought to myself, "My God I wish someone who knew me in 1991 had seen that movie recently and suggested getting me some therapy before I spent fifteen years punishing myself for not dying."

In case anyone who's never suffered from PTSS wasn't sure, Timothy Hutton's portrayal of survivor's guilt was spot-on, and he could have been me easily. Of the other characters, only the father bore any resemblance to real life counterparts in my life. My dad was great, although he didn't know how to help me any more than anyone else did, and my mom was in that very large boat with a great many other people too.

The movie and its actors were nominated for or won several awards, and it's been 27 years (no it hasn't, I would be old if that were true, but I digress), so no one needs me to tell them the movie was and is fantastic, if in a sombrer sense than that word is normally used, and I can vouch that it is every bit as relevant now as it was then.

I just wish someone, even me, had seen it 16 years ago, and connected the dots. So much time wasted. But, I am feeling much better now, even if I am a little bitter over the lost time.

Grr.

No, not Gir, the loveable if altogther dubiously functional sidekick of Zim. Grr, as in "Grrr!! They're driving me crazy!!"

So, I got me a forward...

(sans pictures of various 'Christian' things and political horsepuckey, and I bolded one part that I touch on later)

"Paul Harvey says: I don't believe in Santa Claus, but I'm not going to sue
somebody for singing a Ho-Ho-Ho song in December. I don't agree with Darwin ,
but I didn't go out and hire a lawyer when my high school teacher taught his
Theory of Evolution Life, liberty or your pursuit of happiness will not be
endangered because someone says a 30-second prayer before a football game. So
what's the big deal? It's not like somebody is up there reading the entire book
of Acts. They're just talking to a God they believe in and asking him to grant
safety to the players on the field and the fans going home from the game. But
it's a Christian prayer, some will argue. Yes, and this is the United States of
America , a country founded on Christian principles. According to our very own
phone book, Christian chu rches outnumber all others better than 200-to-1. So
what would you expect -- somebody chanting Hare Krishna? If I went to a football
game in Jerusalem ,
I would expect to hear a Jewish prayer.
If I went to
a soccer game in Baghdad ,
I would expect to hear a Muslim prayer.
If I
went to a ping pong match in China,
I would expect to hear someone pray to
Buddha.
And I wouldn't be offended. It wouldn't bother me one bit. When in
Rome .. But what about the atheists? Is another argument. What about them?
Nobody is asking them to be baptized. We're not going to pass the collection
plate. Just humor us for 30 seconds. If that's asking too much, bring a Walkman
or a pair of ear plugs. Go to the bathroom. Visit the concession stand. Call
your lawyer! Unfortunately, one or two will make that call. One or two will tell
thousands what they can and cannot do. I don't think a short prayer at a
football game is going to shake the world's foundations. Christians are just
sick and tired of turning the other cheek while our courts strip us of all our
rights. Our parents and grandparents taught us to pray before eating; to pray
before we go to sleep. Our Bible tells us to pray without ceasing. Now a handful
of people and their lawyers are telling us to cease praying. God, help us. And
if that last sentence offends you, well . .
just sue me. The silent majority
has been silent too long. It's time we let that one or two who scream loud
enough to be heard that the vast majority don't care what they want. It is time
the majority rules! It's time we tell them, you don't have to pray; you don't
have to say the pledge of allegiance; you don't have to believe in God or attend
services that honor Him. That is your right, and we will honor your right .. But
by golly, you are no longer going to take our rights away. We are fighting back
.. and we WILL WIN! God bless us one and all ... especially those who denounce
Him , God bless America, despite all her faults. She is still the! greatest
nation of all. God bless our service men who are fighting to protect our right
to pray and worship God.
2007 will be the year the silent
majority is
heard and we put God back as the foundation of our families and institutions...
and our Military come home from all the wars. Keep looking up.
If you agree
with this, please pass it on. If not delete it. AND THAT'S THE REST OF THE
STORY"

Ok, first off, what? My only options regarding this are either agree and pass it on, or delete it and STFUn00b? I don't think so, senor. See, as you may have noticed, this IS America, and I DO have freedom of speech. So, get ready for a little dissent...

My reply:

Ok,
Given that Jesus bade us turn the other cheek, it seems to be in exceptionally poor judgement for the author of this message (Larry King no less) to use that same phrase as follows:

"Christians are just sick and tired of turning the other cheek while our courts strip us of all our rights."

I beg to differ. As a Christian, I am neither sick, nor tired, of doing as Christ asked me to do. Insofar as prayer in public goes, Christ himself criticized the Sadduccees for their public displays of affection for God when their private behavior showed them to be hypocrites. Prayer is meant to be between one man and his God, not an in-your-face show of Christianity to the public. Frankly, I think with the world the way it is, and Armageddon looming in the not-too-distant future (thank God!), Jesus has better things to do than pass messages to God asking for His intervention one way or the other in a sporting event.

Now, I'm not being deliberately obtuse. I understand that the message's intent was to show concern over the way the legal system is crapping all over freedom of religion. The thing is, it's not a real problem. Black on black violence is a real problem. Teen pregnancy is a real problem. World hunger is a real problem. This illegal, immoral, and just plain evil and cowardly invasion and occupation of Iraq is a real problem. Our power-maddened Resident Bush is a real problem. Larry King needs to sharpen his claws on an actual issue if he wants my support.

Oh, and as far as the state-mandated loyalty oath goes, let's not forget that that oh-so-precious phrase "under God" was added by Senator Joe "the Commies are hiding under my bed!" McCarthy to make sure the USA's state-mandated loyalty oath wasn't as blatantly a state-mandated loyalty oath as the one that good little commie kids were reciting under banners of Stalin and Mao in other countries. State-mandated loyalty oaths have no place in a democratic country, and Christians, whom Jesus admonished to remain apolitical when he said "My kingdom is no part of this earth." have absolutely no business whatsoever acting as advocates of such abominations. Where do your loyalties lie, "Christians", with your country, or your God? "A slave cannot serve two masters."

Now, I've said my piece on this issue. I don't hate America, any more than I hate any other geopolitical region of earth, nor do I love it, any more than I would any other region. Fact is, I don't care one way or the other about ANY country. I do not regard patriotism as a virtue. In fact, I regard it as a vice. Displaying pride over where random happenstance decreed your mother would drop you out is almost as valid a point to take pride in as the color of one's skin or the epicanthic fold (or lack thereof) in one's eyelids.

Personally, if those are Larry King's actual words, I think he needs to go back on his meds.

Huh? I have a 'blog?!?

Sheesh, been so busy running around I forgot about the silly thing. Now it's going to be all pouty and stuff and stuff.

Well, hey, I got an idea . . . I'll make a post on the other blog, so this one will get jealous.

Brilliant!

Oh yeah

BTW, I have a blog for my adventures in Kentucky. It's at My New Kentucky Home.

Dayaaaam

Looks like freakin' Beruit around here. Well, no, not really. I can't back that up. But maybe a refugee camp...

Scant days remain to my NY residency status. Which reminds me, I'll need to have a tax service do my returns next year.

My God I am exhausted.

And the movers haven't found another load yet, so they haven't given me a pickup time and date, other than the guaranteed three-day window. At least it takes some of the time pressure to hurry and get everything done RIGHT NOW off. Which is good, because see above one-sentence paragraph.

This... this cannot be!!

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!



Tell me this is a horrible, horrible, HORRIBLE, lie!



Please!!

"Roughing It"

So, I'm back from a week in the Adirondacks. It was time I could ill spare from the neccessities of packing and preparing to move to another state, but time well spent nonetheless with my closest friends in this one, Orlo and Jojo, and their baby Lojo.

Here's the specifics: we rented a 'cottage' (actually a rather nice converted mobile home with several expansions) for a week. The cottage was situated within easy walking distance of Brant Lake, which itself is rather nice. Included in the rental was shared access to a 'private' beach. In this case, 'private' meant that if none of the owner's relatives or friends also using some of their properties up there weren't using the 12 feet long, 1 foot wide strip of sand, we were welcome to us it ourselves. Also included was the use of a canoe (too tippy for a baby, no thanks), a rowboat, and a paddleboat (which had been loaned out- 'Sorry, did we forget to mention that? Oopsie.').

The 212 mile drive up was fairly pleasant, went without a hitch thanks largely to MapQuest, and took about 4 hours. Pre-loading was fairly horrendous, I simply had no idea how much baggage is required to adequately provide for the needs of an infant away from home. Between that monstrous pile of gear, and the stuff for mom and dad, almost all available space in one pickup and one sedan was taken, leaving just barely enough room for my duffel bag (bachelors travel remarkably light). My offer to drive having been dismissed contemptuously by Mom, as she had no intention of entrusting her infant son to my driving (although I have a perfect driving record), I spent as much of the drive as possible snoozing.

(It is worth mentioning here that the night before leaving, I had stood in line for two and a half hours at Borders to get my copy of the 7th and last installment of the Harry Potter series, The Deathly Hallows. That I purchased it after midnight and then fled to the mountains to read it in peace without spoilers was no accident either. I too fell prey to the wretched abominations who felt it was their duty to sprint everywhere with bullhorns and bold fonts spouting "Snape kills Dumbledore, page 621!!" when the sixth book came out, and I had no desire to have this book ruined for me too. So packed away in my bag was my copy of The Deathly Hallows. I was snoozing because I had been unable to sleep from the combined excitement of having a long-awaited sequel (and final installment!) in my hands, deathly fear of some asshat ruining it for me, and anticipation of a camping trip in the morning, so I had read up to about pg 350 by then.)

So, we got there, unloaded, and then leafed through the fat binder of rules, dire warnings, and imprecations (and a few brochures for various restaraunts and tourist traps, natch) threatening to cause forfeiture of the security deposit should any infractions occur. No, really. An inch-and-a-half thick binder.

Needless to say, while the location itself was nice, the various disappointments inflicted upon us by the draconian rules (which we were guaranteed to break thanks to numerous booby-traps rigged to force infractions, like falling picture frames and rigged blinds, and doors with siezed return arms, and 40-pound mirrors on them), and broken promises (no paddleboat, sorely limited and woefully tiny beach, etc...) , actually elevated our stress levels rather than letting them lower. My advice is to stay far, far, away from 'Almost Heaven Realtors' when planning your Adirondack getaway. The key word in their name is 'Almost'.

It wasn't a total bust though. We did have some fun shopping in Bolton, we scarpered about in some tiny caves at the Natural Stone Bridge site, managed to get the 12 foot beach to ourselves a couple of days (well, once), and of course, we hung out, sat around the fire, DIDN'T GO TO WORK AT ALL FOR NINE DAMN DAYS, and generally relaxed as much as is humanly possible under those conditions. Orlo and I even squeezed in a few games of Magic: the Gathering, and a round of Monopoly (which I gave up on in disgust after he managed to get Pennsylvania Avenue, dashing my last hope at a monopoly better than Med and Baltic, while he had all the purples, oranges, reds, and Boardwalk and Park Place, most with hotels by then). Seriously Orlo, go to fucking Vegas already and get rich at the craps tables. Why the hell do you work for a living with luck like yours?

Highlights-

• All of us laughing ourselves silly repeating my mispronunciation of 'school' as shool while we were peering at road signs while wandering in Vermont. This occurred numerous times: "Hey look, a shool bus!", "Hey look, a middle shool!", "Darn it, why aren't these little punks in shool?"
• Several excellent experiences dining out. Seems like the locals don't screw with their meal ticket, service and food was uniformly excellent no matter where we dined.
• Lots of great weather = lots of teeny bikinis. God bless bikinis!!
• In RE the last highlight, me being single and free to openly ogle. Yay freedom!!

Lowlights-

• Who cares? I got to look at hineys and boobies.
• Other than the stuff I mentioned, nothing worth mentioning.

I'd like to believe this... (click on me)

... but let's face it, Iran wants nukes, and North Korea needs oil. Iran HAS oil, and North Korea HAS nukes. This is how international trade works.

I predict that in Iran, one or more oil tankers are being refitted with 'special cargo compartments', and that in Korea, 'special cargo' is being readied for shipping.

But, I'm a nasty suspicious sort of person, so, don't listen to me.

Say what?

Name Changed
123 Fake St. Apt. 1
Suburbia, NY 13777

7-10-07

Current Boss
Energy and Computing Management
456 Made-up Rd.
Central City, NY 13666

I wanted to give you written notice of my intention to resign from my position as a BST I at Not-Quite-Ivy University, effective Friday, August 10th, 2007.

I want to thank you for the numerous opportunities I have had to learn here. It has been a pleasure serving the university, the students, the environment, and best of all doing all of this while taking a small bite out of the energy companies' pockets.

I will gladly cooperate in any way that I can in making the transition easier for all concerned. If needed after I move, I can be reached at the above e-mail address.

Name Changed

Talk about one-upsmanship...

So, I was all proud of myself for removing a rusty razor blade from the roadside.

"Well," says MOUNT HOLLY, North Carolina's Jerry Melton, aged 46, "La-de-da." He went fishing, and pulled this from the Catawba River last week.

It's our own fault. We let people like the asstard that put it there breed.

Boy I'm glad I stepped outside my apartment today...

...otherwise I would not have noticed that razor scraper blade lying at the side of the road, right where some child's bare foot probably would have trod.

It is now safely ensconced in the dumpster at the other end of the parking lot, and I managed to get it there without slicing myself open with it, so apparently no one will need a tetanus booster series today.

I would ask what would possess anyone to leave such a thing lying around, but, you know, someone might tell me, and then I'd probably be morally compelled to go on a twenty to thirty state rampage, slapping the ever-loving shit out of assholes everywhere, and that would just depress the hell out of me after experiencing the absolute futility of it.

To the ignorant PoS that left that blade on the road: take note. The day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night, and not nearly soon enough for me. There's far too many of you for me to even make a dent in, but God is keeping track of each and every one of you stains, and He has just the right stuff to scrub you out with.

But for now, take solace in knowing that my rage-o-meter is pegged past redline yet again.

Hay youse guys, I'se is litrit two...

So, Highlander's been flexing his lit-peen on his blog lately, and I realised that I can do that too.

I'm pretty sure I haven't mentioned them on my blog before, but there is a series of alternative history novels written (mostly) by Eric Flint. The first is titled 1632, and, oddly enough, that number corresponds to the year the book is set in, 1632 AD. The premise is that, through some at-the-time undetermined cosmic mishap, a small modern-day West Virginia mining town is transposed with a section of light woods from the Thuringia region of Renaissance Germany, smack in the middle of the Reformation, at the height of the Thirty Years War.

With whacky results.

The odd thing is, I was in a Waldenbooks, looking for some older S.M. Stirling titles (Draka series), and one of the salespersons suggested 1632 to me as a possible alternative that I might enjoy. After devouring it, I returned to the store a few days later to snap up all remaining titles they had. And yes, I mentioned to the lady on duty on that visit that the sale was due to a referral by one of her people, so hopefully they got an attaboy.

One of the coolest things about this series is that fan input has led to further developments in the 'main storyline'. Eric invited people to contribute short stories set in his new timeline, published the best of those in a couple anthologies, and then adopted several of the characters as lead players in future works in the series. I'm not sure if Mr. Flint realised it when he made the invitation, but incorporation of these disparate viewpoints has actually made the source work stronger by allowing it to better reflect the theme I believe he's been pushing (Melting Pot Democracy = Good, Totalitarianism = Bad).

Anyway, I highly reccommend the series.

This one calls for the old Billy Berule

So. I'm on the cusp of a truly life-altering event. And my feet are freezing. Tomorrow, a man will be calling about a fantastic job opportunity, and if the phone interview goes well, well, my life could see some dramatic changes. Scary, the safety net has never been so small, nor the paramedics so far away, changes.

And, you know, I'm frankly terrified.

I'm like, 51% sure I'm doing the right thing, so as CEO, I'm gonna do it, but the stockholders are NOT happy. Some of them are sure to sell, others will probably hold onto theirs, hoping to 'ride out the storm'.

I'm being a little too dramatical for just changing careers though, aren't I? Well, truth be told, I've been playing my cards very close to my vest. But we're down to the last raise, and it looks like the guy across from me is gonna call. Time to lay 'em on the table.

The job is in Kentucky. And whether this 'golden opportunity' pans out or not, I am moving down there, to 'hit that reset button'.

Life has just gotten too... different, for me here in NY. I've... burned some bridges, watched others rot away, there's one or two I definitely recall calling in air missions to service. Too many places that those bridges used to go to that I can't go to anymore around here, and the few places I can go are starting to feel like a prison. I need to find some new crossings. I need to find some strangers on the other side to make friends out of.

(See, I told you my super power was nailing my descriptive analogies.)

The friends I have here are important to me, but while I've been trapped in a prison of my own making, they've moved on, and intentionally or not, most of them have left me behind. To a large extent, even my family has moved on without me. And that is what I have to do. I have to get my life moving again. It stopped all those years ago, and when the starting gun fired, I just flinched a little and ignored it.

It's just too comfortable in this little prison I've called my life the last 16 years. Too safe to bother starting anything, too easy to give up on anything I do start, too easy to go back to the way it was. The way it is. My life has been far too simple for far too long, and I am atrophying from inaction, body and soul. It's time to kick it up a notch.


UPDATE-

Heh, that was a damned good interview, I thought. Then again, any interview you do in your bedroom, wearing underpants and a t-shirt, is bound to go well. A lot harder to relax in a strange place, face to face with strangers who have something you want, it is.

...for good men to do nothing.

Clicking on the title of this post will take you to the website of the Falun Gong movement. I'm sure some of you are at least dimly aware of what FG is, and that the Chinese governement is 'being mean to them'.

I warn you, what you will see on this website is not for the faint of heart. When China (the Chinese government, not the people as a whole) thinks no one is looking, China is a pitiless and merciless bully and tormentor.

I have no money, and little if any charisma, so I cannot help them with funding or fundraising. But I can point them out to you, and you can point them out to others, and since we're all six degrees from Kevin Bacon anyway, he should get the message soon, and he can help them out. (You know what I mean. I realize I'm being somewhat flippant, but believe me I am serious.)

Now, I know you're thinking to yourselves: "But, Tinfoil Hatter, you're, you're a vociferous and dogged Christian, aren't you worried about setting other gods before Jehovah?" Well, frankly, no. If you can tell me what 'god' practitioners of FG are worshipping, I'll consider worrying about that question, until then, people that are involved in mild exercise and a focussing meditation (that would serve admirably for prayer time if one was so inclined) aren't doing anything wrong in my or any other sane persons' books.

China is violating so many basic human rights it exhausts me to think about them, let alone attempt to enumerate them. So, in addition to merely spreading the word in this feeble way, I urge everyone worldwide to refuse to buy anything China exports until they address their human rights violations in a real way. Not just form a panel and yap about it, either; I'm talking various criminal thugs tried and arrested in accessible courtrooms, and sentenced and imprisoned, starting with that rotten bastard in charge, Jiang Zemin. Until he is deposed, buy nothing from China. And even afterward, wait to make sure they're not just pretending.

This Post is brought to you by the letter 'P'...

So, there's a meme going around. I got the letter 'p'. Deal.

However, any old 10 things about the letter 'p' is too easy, so I'm tightening the noose. None of my 'p's' can be parted from their 'q's'.

Hmm...

Parquet- Not just a semi-palatable spread, it's also a type of floor covering. Does this count as two? Not in my book, baby.

Pipsqueak- Pretty much anyone standing next to me.

Pink Quartz- Also known as rose quartz, it's a fairly common stone of low value.

Pennsylvania's Quarter- it's got a rock (Keystone), a broad (the statue Commonwealth), and a barn wall (outline of the state). There's a joke in there somewhere, but I seem to have missed it. (OK, seriously, am I good, or what?)

Pumpkin Quiche- try the recipe, it sounds delicious.

Professional Quoits- Total Expected Prize Awards for this Season's 2007 Tour may approach
$15,000!

Quiz Proctor- The title you aspire to when you join this group of academcians in semi-formal private internal competition.

Quixotic Protagonist- see Fox Mulder, Charlie Brown, or Bruce Banner

Perfidious Quandry- to quote the Green Goblin: "Let die the one you love, or suffer the little children?"

Paragon Quacker- see Daffy Duck. Nobunny ducks it better.


I'm expecting that pumpkin quiche by FedEx soon, dammit.

Move over Katrina...

... there's gonna be some new sherriffs in town.

This link will take you to to a page holding near-realtime water temperature data in the Gulf of Mexico and along its coast. Water temperature is one of the stronger indicators for potentially devastating storms and hurricanes. Why? Oh, fine, I aced Earth Science in high school, so I'll explain. (Explanation and science behind it are subject to lapses in memory, high school was a long time ago.)

Water is one of earth's most powerful batteries for the storage of heat energy. Weather, that catch-all term for atmospheric phenomenon in general, is largely the by-product of the transfer of heat from one location to another. Actually, 'largely' is kind of misleading. It's actually almost totally the by-product of such transfers. The other contrubutor is actual changes in air pressure (but, I dryly note, those changes in air pressure are caused by changes in temperature).

Now, water, as I mentioned, acts as a battey for heat. I'm not going to get into the physics of it (And believe me, the particle physics properties of water cause many a physicist's head to get scratched, and vigorously! It's simply an excruciatingly technical and very dull subject, trust me.), for which you ought to be grateful. What I am going to say is that water, for a substance so common and (relatively) stable in all three states (solid, liquid, and gas), has an amazingly high specific heat. Specific heat is basically a measure of how much energy a particular substance needs to absorb before it will change states from solid to liquid to gas. That high specific heat is what makes water such a good battery for storing heat.

So, that means, something? Well, yes. What it means is, the warmer a large body of water gets, the more water molecules get turned into vapor. Water vapor is the most energetic state (Well, there's plasma, but water tends to break down into hydrogen and oxygen under conditions where it would plasm, and then recombines and plasms a lot, and that's pretty messy, so let's forget it and just stick with what we have, ok? Seriously, if the Gulf of Mexico plasms, hurricanes will be the least of your worries, turst me.) of water, meaning that water vapor holds a whole damn lot of heat, and lots of it getting pumped into the atmoshpere means that the atmosphere is getting charged with a lot, a LOT, of energy.

And that energy has to go somewhere. Remember, weather is all about moving heat from one chunk of air to another chunk of air with less heat. The more energy a particular chunk of air absorbs in the for of water vapor, the stronger that heat transfer is going to be.

As air cools, the vapor condenses, and you get rain. But the air also tends to sink as it cools, and create a down draft. The air under that downdraft gets pushed aside, and becomes wind, and as air rushes away from an area, the air pressure drops, and more water condenses, and more air cools, and it gets to the point where some neighboring air mass with more heat starts transferrring its heat to that location.

So, [weather] = [heat transfers in the atmosphere] and that means [lots of warm water] = [lots of trouble]. So, bookmark that site, and check in from time to time. Expect a hurricane when the water temp is over 88dF. Expect a whopper when it's over 92dF.

Take the test...

You scored as The Amazing Spider-Man. After being bitten by a radioactive spider, Peter Parker was transformed from a nerdy high school student into New York's greatest hero. Peter enjoys the thrill of being a super hero, but he struggles with the burdens of leading a double life. He hopes someday to win the heart of his true love Mary Jane, the woman he's loved since before he even liked girls. Right now, he just wants to make it through college and pay his bills.

Maximus		75%
The Amazing Spider-Man		75%
Batman, the Dark Knight		67%
Captain Jack Sparrow		63%
Neo, the "One"		58%
Indiana Jones		58%
The Terminator		46%
El Zorro		46%
Lara Croft		42%
William Wallace		33%
James Bond, Agent 007		25%

Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
created with QuizFarm.com

Woo-hoooooo!! Spider-Mayaaaaan. Only The most noble, The most coolest, and generally the bestest of the bestest of superheroes of all time ever!! In yo faces!!

Goodbye, my friend.

It is with a sense of loss that I wish you a fond farewell. Your husband has taken a new job in a distant state, and, as he is a wise and sane man, is taking you with him. There are 'people' who will mistake my feelings as some sort of crush. They are... misinformed by their prejudices.

I don't have a crush on you. And when I say that my feelings for you run deeper than that, I don't mean in a sense that these 'people' are familiar with. They are simple beasts, unable to comprehend the idea of a man having feelings of a positive, yet non-amorous nature, for a woman like you. If I say that I like you, they assume it is in the fashion that most men 'like' women.

They, like me, can see that you have beauty. But sadly, that seems to be all they see, so it is the only motivation they could ascribe to my feelings for you. They do not see the warmth within you, that spark of kindness, decency, and genuine Goodness, that inspires you to show kindness to those whom you have no reason to be kind to, such as yours truly. I can not benefit you in any way, and yet you offer friendship without strings.

I don't know what religion you practice (or whether you practice a religion), but you are truly a daughter of Christ. And it is in that bond of sisterhood and brotherhood that my feelings for you spring. You are your husband's wife, and I have no aspirations in that direction. But I will miss you sorely when you leave, because the warmth you've shone on me, and everyone around you, is a rare and precious gift.

Beauty. The word is an obscenity the way they use it. If they had eyes to see, your real beauty would stun them. And my world will get a litte darker now.

And to put it in words they might grasp: Man it sucks to lose a friend.

Hooray!

http://www.cnn.com/2007/SHOWBIZ/Movies/05/10/people.lindsaylohan.ap/index.html

That... *sniff* says it all. DVD and a mute button, and I'm golden.

One Phone Call...

...and my whole day is shot to hell.

I work in a call center, taking, among a great many other calls, after-hours maintenance calls. I just got one from the morons that are in charge of campus security here at Not-Quite-Ivy University. They got an alarm on their doors panel that a loading dock door at the School of Communications was in alarm. At 10:30am this morning. And JUST NOW, about 2 hours and 40 minutes after the shop in charge of that building closed shop for the day, do they call to ask about it.

Double-you. Tee. Eff.

These lackluster dumbshits who aspire to incompetence are armed with frigging GUNS. I weep, I wail, I guh-nash my teeth in frustration. Two hours, forty-seven minutes into my shift, and my rage-o-meter needle is pegged past redline. God can only be merciful: were He anything else, I would hold the power of life and death over others, and there would be blood. Everywhere. But, I am, despite all indicators, and every sane expectation, a pacifist. And so, they stumble on, dragging me down to their level and beating me with experience.

I need a vacation.

So... where's the reset button?

Ok, so, my old blog had to be deleted because of nosy co-workers, so I'm not sure how much of this is news, and how much is known, to my three regular readers (mom, me, and the crazy cat lady).

So, as some of you knew, I was suffering from pretty severe depression last year, and for a long time before that. Well, the fact is, the depression was really just a symptom of a much deeper problem. I'd been suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Syndrome since witnessing my best friend's death, and no one really knew what to do to help me for years, and it kind of festered for about 16 years. And while it festered, I basically crawled into the bottom of my soul, curled up in a fetal position, and sucked my thumb while the auto-pilot ran things for sixteen years. I don't know how else to describe it.

The good news is, I'm feeling much better now. But the bad news is... obscene. The 'auto-pilot' Nate, my own personal Beta Unit (Watch 'The Last Starfighter', or nod sagely because you already have.), in the course of running my life, well, it went and did some things that can't be undone. Some shouldn't be undone, some I wouldn't undo even if I could, and many needed to be done. Because I'm going to need to do so for any chance of making sense of things, I'm going to call him Nate2.

Nate2 went out and got laid a few times. But he wasn't a real person, and couldn't keep a relationship going. Nate2 went out and made friends. But he didn't have enough of a functioning heart to let any of them into. (But he did keep bringing them down and laying them at my feet like a dutiful housecat delivering birds and squirrels for family provender. That was enough to attach a few of them to the real me, thank God.) Nate2 went out and got me a few jobs, a driver's license, and moved me around like a nomad. Nate2 made a brief effort to get my body into shape, and then gave up. Nate2 beat me, screamed at me, threw water on me, pissed in my face, and finally managed to get me barely functional enough to spend some time with my father before he died, and that is something worth thanking him for above all other things, because otherwise the regret of not being there with my father would be killing me. I think that also put me on the road to recovery, because that's when I finally poked my head out long enough to get the help I needed. Nate2 edited two bad friendship choices out of my life, but he did it rather clumsily, and aftershocks still rumble from one of those 'relation-quakes'.

But Nate2 didn't do one really important thing for me: he didn't take any mental pictures. In the last sixteen years or so, not only has my short-term memory detoriorated badly, I have very few detailed memories of anything I did, anyone I met, or anyplace I went. It's like everything from that period is a story someone told me, and I only remember a few of the more interesting parts. The lack of memories has hurt me in more than the obvious way, too.

Memories of the past are part of learning. There's a lot of things I haven't learned yet, because while Nate2 was takin' care o' bidness, I was... doing nothing, feeling nothing, caring about nothing. You can't learn anything about life that way.

I've spent the last 16 years in what amounts to a waking coma. And now I've finally awoken, and the whole world has moved on without me. I'm sixteen years behind schedule, 21 years old, in a 37-year-old body. I'm completely unprepared for grey hair, baldness, aches and pains, adult responsibilities like rent and paying the bills and taking care of my shit. The problem is, people don't see the 21-year-old me, they see this 37-year-old that I don't know how to be.

I'm 21 years old. I should be out 'sowing my wild oats'. Problem is, they've gone moldy waiting for me to do so. And 37 is too damn old to be 'hitting on chicks'.

I have sixteen years of catching up to do, and I don't even know where to begin trying to figure out how to go about starting to do that. I desperately need a reset button. And that's one thing life doesn't give us.

So, this is it. Some people I know have hinted around that they sorta sometimes read this blog. Yet none of them have ever posted here. Well, now is the time to start. I need some help here. I am lost, flailing in cowshit. Now, more than ever, I could use a little advice.

Ok, seriously, this has to stop.

So, some more "Christians", trying to "save lives" tried to blow up another clinic.

Now, I'm not even going to get into the whole abortion thing. I'll sum that up by saying that it has its very limited place in the list of sometimes unfortunately neccessary medical procedures (in my opinion) and leave that at that.

No, today, my poisoned pen is aimed straight at the hearts of you so-called, self-styled "Christians", who act anything but Christian. Hey bozos, here's a quick rule of thumb for you: If you're breaking one of the Ten Commandments, chances are, you're not behaving as a Christian should, and therefore, you're not a Christian. So stop soiling my Father's good Name by attaching your blasphemous atrocities to It.

And guess what? Murdering random people by setting an explosive device where it will go off and kill a bunch of people? That violates Exodus 20:13; 'You must not murder.' Now, you might try to justify your evil actions by claiming that they were done 'in defense of the unborn', but that's a load of hogwash and we both know it. You don't know for a fact that whoever was going to be near that bomb when it went off would be in the act of providing or getting an abortion, or even if they would be considering such action in the future. People go into those clinics for all kinds of other reasons too. Some are getting regular checkups, some are getting pre-natal treatment for their pregnancies, some are having an STD treated, or who knows what? The point is, you didn't know who would be there when that bomb went off (had your sick cowardly plot gone off as planned, that is; kudos to the brave men and women of the BDU who thwarted your cowardly attack), and so your attack could have killed any number of innocent people.

You are cowards. You champion nothing but the hatred in Satan's heart, and you are evil, twisted people. If you think Jehovah approves of what you do, you are badly misled. Confess, repent, and mend your ways.

End of line.

He shouldn't have been allowed to buy any guns...

No, really.

That's right. Virginia, the state where 'anyone can buy a gun, anywhere, anytime', actually already had a law (actually, it's a federal GC law, which is illegal, but what the hey) that should have prevented Cho from arming himself legally. But no one bothered to enforce it after the judge sent for the nice young men in their clean white coats to come and take Cho away.

So, I guess, the solution is... more GC laws? Question, will we be actually enforcing these new laws, or will they be ignored too?

Now, I hate to have to ask this, but are my staunchest critics ready to yield even slightly? Are you willing to admit that just maybe, this one time, I am right? We do not need more GC laws. What we need is for criminals to start obeying them, or the authorities to actually enforce them.

'Rivin', On a Jet Plane

Hi honey, I'm home.

Oh, right, I live alone.

The Big Fat Geek Wedding was, all in all, a smashing success. D-Wreck, the Teen of Sound, suffered a minor mishap, but other than that, I think it went rather well.

Super-Drama Teen proceeded to make changes to her hair (thereby possibly ruining her secret identity) which I kinda like after the ceremony, but it is a striking difference from the original, and thus her mother, once known to evil-doers everywhere as Super Fiancee, and now known to evil-doers everywhere as Super Wife, prevailed successfullly upon her to delay the change until after the ceremony in which she was Maid of Honor, thanks to a brief possession by the Power Cosmic.

Super Dependable Teen and Super Adorable Kid, also were temporarily promoted, to Bridesmaid and Flower Grrl (whose nemesis Bumblebee showed up and tried to intimidate, but whom yr humble author shooed away) respectively.

Vows were given, rings were exchanged, irrevocable bonds of family were forged. It was a great day for all that is right and good in the universe. Even the weather played nice.

And, then I saw Thunder, hung around, played some Magic, a little Apples to Apples, and we shot the breeze a whole bunch. (I've found that I can play Magic as long as I don't own any cards. That seems to work for me. Otherwise I'm just a whiny little bitch-baby. And sometimes even then.)

This is how real heroes die.

Professor Liviu Librescu (LIV-ee-oo lih-BRESS-cue), 76, Israel
Engineering science and mathematics lecturer. Was a holocaust survivor. (AP)
Confirmed by his wife, Marlon. Librescu had taught at Virginia Tech for 22
years and had been married for 42 years.
The class schedule indicates
Librescu was teaching Solid Mechanics in room 204 in Norris Hall.
"His
research has enabled better aircraft, superior composite materials, and more
robust aerospace structures," said Ishwar K. Puri, the head of the engineering
science and mechanics department. (AP)
Librescu's son, Joe, said his father's students sent e-mails detailing how the
professor saved their lives by closing the doorway of his classroom against the
approaching gunman. (AP)
"My father blocked the doorway with his body and
asked the students to flee," Joe Librescu said Tuesday in a telephone interview
from his home outside of Tel Aviv. "Students started opening windows and jumping
out." (AP)
Here is his website, which includes his photo: http://www.esm.vt.edu/php/person.php?id=10023

76 years old, toughed out the Nazi's, taught the world a thing or two about how to make planes, and when push came to shove, didn't even blink at doing the right thing. Liviu spent his probably few remaining years to buy lifetimes for his students. Words cannot express how much I admire an unconditional love that strong. Don't know about you, but if I'm lucky enough to die this way, I'll consider my life well spent. This guy for sure is one of the people that could have been armed and able to deal with Cho had there not been a 'gun-free zone'. Then I'd be telling you how real heroes live instead.

Damn I'm pissed. The answer to criminals with guns is not taking guns away from people who obey the law. How anyone could think otherwise literally boggles my mind.

Virginia Tech, Gun Control, and you.

So, naturally, some people got shot by a kid who should have been medicated two years ago and removed from school, and the problem isn't that the system failed to get him the help he needed, oh no. The problem, dear readers, is that he was able to legally purchase a gun.

Never mind that he wrote disturbing plays. Never mind that at least one teacher and several fellow students reported his strange, obsessive, dangerously anti-social behavior to numerous authorities. Never mind the fact that it's documented fact that just about any nutbag can 'play sane' long enough to fool a casual observer. Not one bit of that matters. All that matters is that he was able to buy a gun. Something has to be done about that!

The crazy people can stay where they are, we just need to get the non-sentient, immobile pieces of gun-shaped metal out of here. Because without a gun, a crazy person is totally harmless. I mean, Jack the Ripper, the Hillside Stranglers, the Boston Strangler, numerous serial stabbers, all will be rendered as harmless as dryer lint once we get some more gun control.

Yeah. That almost makes sense. Except for the part where it's complete fricking gibberish.

You know what WOULD have been a godsend at VT that day? One student licensed to carry concealed. Just one. But the university lobbied hard, and got a local gun ban instilled on the campus, so students had no legal recourse to defend themselves. Gun control at work. There wasn't even ONE armed security guard, in place to actually, you know, enforce the existing gun control. I mean, Allah's Alabaster Ass (sorry, but I desperately needed to say something blasphemous here), we're gonna take away everyone's right to defend themselves, and then use the Honor System to enforce it? Whose genius plan was that? Is Pollyanna Whittier in charge of security at VT? The jackasses that dreamed up 'gun-free' zones desperately need to read Larry Niven's 'Anarchy Park' stories, and plant, water, weed, tend, grow, and finally harvest a stinking clue.

It's almost too bizarre to countenance, I know. Someone planning to break the murder laws then stooping to violate a gun control law too. I mean, that's just unbelieveable. Who could possibly have ever predicted that such a thing would occur? Clearly, I mean obviously, it's plain as day to any sane person that we need to enact and pass some more gun control laws.

Bragging Rights

I was over at Your Girl Friday's, posting something in her comment threads about movies, and John Cusak, when I reminded myself of something I once said in a theatre that was so funny, I still snicker at it to this day.

I was at a screening of Deep Impact with a female friend (whom I no longer associate with). We were at the point in the movie where President Morgan Freeman breaks the news to the world about the impending doom descending upon all earthkind, and I saw it: an opportunity for true hilarity.

So I leaned over and whispered to my former female friend: "Geeze, I guess 'they' were right."

She, a fiercly liberal journalism major college graduate, whispered back, "Huh?"

"The first black president gets elected, and now the world is gonna end."

She laughed so hard she was crying. Impressive, given that she managed to do it quietly enough to not get us thrown out.

What's the funniest thing YOU'VE ever said?

I'd rather be a hammer than a nail...

Ok, so, I stole this from The Oral Reporter, aka Super-Fiancee.

If I was an hour of the day... I would be the midnight hour.
If I was a planet... I would be Mercury, simmering in the sun. My cold side would freeze you solid, my hot side would cause you to burst into flames.
If I was a direction... I would be aki (one of the cardinal directions of the fourth dimension. Up, down, left, right, in, out, aki, neta.).
If I was a piece of furniture... I would be an overstuffed sofa positioned strategically in front of a fireplace, perfect for reading in on rainy days or snuggling in with a lover on wintry ones.
If I was a liquid... I would be molten silver.
If I was a sin... I would be a dead heat between sloth and gluttony.
If I was a rock... I would be part of a Playmate's belly-jewel (rock as in diamond, dig?).
If I was a tree... I would be home to a family of man-eating squirrels.
If I was a fruit... I would be a watermelon.
If I was a flower... I would be pressed flat in a book.
If I was a musical instrument... I would be a steel guitar.
If I was an element... I would be argon.
If I was color... I would be the golden fire of sun behind thin clouds. Yeah.
If I was an animal... I would be a tortoise.
If I was a sound... I would be keyboard keys clattering.
If I was music... I would be 'In the Halls of the Mountain King'.
If I was a music style... I would be classic rock.
If I was a feeling... I would be that nagging sensation that you've forgotten something important.
If I was a book... I would be 'To Serve Man'.
If I was a food... I would be spaghetti and meatballs with sausage.
If I was a place... I would be The Lost Temple where the Mystic Frammistat that is the only weakness of the Big Bad Guy Threatening All of Existence is kept. I would be loaded with booby-traps, and guarded by fanatics. You'd die before you crossed the threshold.
If I was a flavor... I would be chocolate and peanut-butter.
If I was a scent... I would be the all-pervasive aroma of someone else's perfectly-popped popcorn, driving you insane just before lunchtime.
If I was a word... I would be 'supercalifragilistic-expialidocious'.
If I was a verb... I would be 'endure'.
If I was an object... I would be a trip hazard
If I was a part of the body... I would be the male brain... the lower brain.
If I was a facial expression... I would be a bemused smile.
If I was a cartoon character... I would be Wile E. Coyote.
If I was a movie... I would be "War of the Roses".
If i was a form.. I would be IRS 1099-G.
If I was a number... I would be the square root of -1.
If I was a season... I would be paprika.
If I was a sentence... I would be life without possibility of parole.

Anaphylactic shock sufferers rejoice!!

Soon one of your primary fears, death by honeybee sting, will be naught but a memory. In the US, bee populations across the fruit belt (southern states and California) have seen sharp declines, from 50-90%, the cause of which has yet to be determined.

Of course, while you're dancing for your new-found freedom from allergic shock, you'll want to find some way to prevent scurvy, because without those bees, it'll be more than honey and wax that disappears from grocery aisles.

Say good-bye to fruits, vegetables, and everything that eats them, like cattle, pigs, and people.

So cheer up! That massive population die-off that everyone's been expecting, it's coming soon, and we're gonna take most of the planet with us when we check out. Way to go, human race!

(Oh, oh yeah. I noticed they listed four possible causes, not one of which was the introduction of GM plants to the ecosystem. Fuckin' great investigative reporting, guys, fuckin' great.)

Union Yes! (Just not in the US)

So. My latest issue of Playboy arived today. And now I'm filled with rage and hatred yet again.

Oh, right, sorry. Okay, for those of you who weren't aware, the average issue of Playboy has maybe twenty of its 120-140 pages devoted to pictures of nekkid wimmen. Page 50 of the latest issue (April 2007), is where a story in Forum (not at all like Penthouse Forum, trust me) talks about something good in Iraq.

Labor Unions are forming in Iraq. Pro-western, feminist, anti-fundamentalist, labor unions. And they have received no support at ALL from the US government up to now. In fact, in 2005, one of their leaders was strangled in his home because the US would not un-freeze the union's assets so they could hire bodyguards to protect him.

So, Democratic Party, you are on notice. Get the lead out of your asses and help these people.

Now.

Oh, one small thing...

If you'd like to do some good in the world and get a swipe in at me at the same time, you have until Sunday to do it.

That's right, I'm helping out with St. Baldrick's Day. (And a month will pass before I'm at the wedding, so I should look ok by then, relax.)

So click on the title of this entry to go to the link to my Shavee site. And don't forget your credit cards.

Rumors

of my demise were not so much exaggerated as they were overly enthusiatic predictions that fell short of reality.

Diagnosis: pneumonia. Doc gave me some powerful antibiotics, an inhaler for congestion, and some lovely LOVELY cough syrup laced with a generous helping of poppy extracts. The latter is very welcome, as I'd been coughing so hard and so much that my entire rib cage ached just breathing, let alone coughing, which was becoming excruciating.

So, anyway, that's why I've been kind of quiet lately. Too sick to blog. Too sick to even do a serviceable job of lying on a couch watching TV.

But I'm feeling much better now... here's hoping the medicinal regimen I'm on does the trick.

Memoire-aide, now with 'w'!!

That was my Google word of the day some time back, and it means the same thing basically, as a white paper. And I figure that some of y'all might want to be able to keep score, so I figured, 'what the hey?' If something's not on the list, and you're the type that slows down at wrecks, drop me a line in the comment threads and I'll add it to the list.

So here's a memoire-aide for you, for me:

Abortion: I oppose using abortion as after-the-fact contraception. I have no problems with using it to end a pregnancy that threatens the life of the mother, such as an ectopic pregnancy, or one complicated by pre-eclampsia or any of a host of other things. (Mind you, I also think a woman who toughs something like that out and has the baby anyway, risking her life in the process, is nothing short of a bona-fide heroine par excellance. But I wouldn't require it of anyone.)

I'm not entirely comfortable with the decision, but I've lumped pregnancies caused by rape or incest in with that, since post-partum depression complicated by post-traumatic stress disorder can increase risk of suicide, so no, I don't oppose abortions being available to rape or incest victims either.

The last exception, and one I'm really, REALLY uncomfortable with, and could VERY easily be talked back out of, is for pregnancies where the child has been found to possess some minor or major abnormality that will reduce its quality of life in some way. My uneasiness with this exception varies inversely with the severity of the defect, IE minor abnormalities like Down's syndrome or Cerbal Palsy make me exceptionally squeamish, while major shit like ancephalia gives me little to no pause.

Basically, if you haven't been raped, your baby's daddy isn't your: brother, (grand)daddy, or uncle, nor a close cousin; and the pregnancy poses no more serious health risk than a typical pregnancy does, and the child on the way has nothing wrong with it to speak of, you have no business ending it's life. By this point, it's been established that no one held a gun to the mother's head to make her pregnant. To my knowledge, pregnancy is the only circumstance a person can get themselves into that large groups of people see nothing wrong with them weaselling their way out of by killing someone else (or even maybe killing someone else, if you're one of those people who thinks that the lack of development on the child's part somehow makes it okay to kill them because they aren't 'human enough' yet).

Anna-Nicole Smith: Has creeped me out ever since the movie (Naked Gun 33 and a third?) where she plays a 'chick with a dick'. Just couldn't look at her after that without getting squeamish. I'm sorry she's dead. Oh, and I most definitely am NOT her baby's daddy. But still, is it just me, or was she kinda homely, in the face? I mean, seriously, her face reminded me of the front of a Mack truck, too darn wide, and a real big grill.

Apartheid: I don't like it. Not even a little bit. I used to give some credence to the idea that some people simply make bad neighbors for each other, but once I realized that that assertion was based on skin color, nah, to hell with that noise. Learn to play nice with each other. Stop being dicks to people because they're 'funny-lookin'.

Baseball: The only real American sport.

Capitalism: I like it. Lassiez-faire is everywhere! People should be allowed to fend for themselves however they choose, and help whomever they please (or no one at all if they so choose). People who claim to believe in freedom of choice had best support capitalism, lest they be seen as hypocrites.

Cloning: What's the big deal? You can't clone a person and get a perfect copy with the same memories, that's fantasy. I think the legal status of cloned humans should be that of 'child of the donor'. Cloning animals for meat or other properties sound like a fantastic idea, assuming it can be done safely. Cloning just an organ would be great, and solve all kinds of problems.

Communism: I'm with history on this one. Doesn't work, never has, never will. No one wants to be told what job to learn and do. No one wants to see their hard work go to someone else's benefit without so much as a thank you, let alone fair market value, save that they give it voluntarily.

Corporatism: I have nothing against businesses per se, but when they get to the corporate stage, too large a gap comes into being between the workers and the highest levels of management. Once this gap is reached, management suddenly loses its ability to see its workforce as human, and begins treating them like assets to buy and sell. I understand that business is business, and the business of business is making a profit, I get it. But while a human can sit back, take stock of his possessions, and realise contentment, and think to himself: 'I have enough, I am happy.', a corporation cannot do this. It is never content, it must always grasp after more and more. And it will sacrifice anyone and anything to get more, no matter who is hurt.

Defense: I believe the only valid reason for the existence of national governments is to protect their citizens from other national governments. Obviously, the second-best way to do this is to have such a powerful standing armed force, that no sane nation would attack them, or make friends with such a nation. The best way is to have lots of friends, and few or no enemies. Unfortunately, the 'best way' is sadly unrealistic in the face of global threats to world peace like Islam and Communism.

Democracy: A nice idea, too bad it won't work above the level of city government.

Democrats (the party): Thoroughly useless idiots. Thankfully, they're mostly harmless, because while they're highly prone to wailing and gnashing of teeth over the personal problems of total strangers that really aren't anyone's fault but the total strangers', their only solution to anything is to throw money at it and hope it goes away. AKA DemonicRats.

Education: I think education is far too important to let the goverment mess it up. Education should be privatized immediately if not sooner. At most the government should be allowed to establish a base curriculum, with minimum requirements for arts, history, science, math, and language, and allow the educators and students to decide what to prioritize. If graduates of a particular school can't find jobs: a) they can sue for breach of contract, b) current students (and their parents) can pull them out and put them in a more successful school, and c) parent organizations can pool resources to improve their own schools without oversight. Competition is always best for the consumer. Where is the competition for public education? In private schools that everyone wants their kids in already; clearly private education is already better than public, else no market would exist for it.

Environment: Something we need to take a lot better care of, starting a long time ago.

Federal Gun Control: It's against the law in the US. Try reading the 2nd Amendment some time. The states can have all the gun control their voters will pass referendums for, I could give a rat's ass. But I happen to think the Constitution was a pretty good idea, and oughtn't be messed with by some 'well-intentioned' individuals who think they know better than everyone else.

Football: A fairly stupid name for a marginally interesting game.

Foreign Policy: See Defense.

GM Foods/Animals: I think experimentation should not be considered complete until a realistic assessment of the impact on the natural envirmonment is completed. The only legitimate way to do this is by testing such products in an enclosed ecosystem for years and years, until everything in said testbed has gone through a few generations to see if anything weird shows up. Until that's done, no GM product should be allowed to enter the natural ecosystem.

Goths: Tee-hee, they're so cute. Emos with lousy fashion sense.

Health Care: I believe that everyone has the right to find a job that offers affordable health insurance, or to refuse to work for companies that don't (which will force the companies to do so, thereby making the point moot). I also believe that people have the right to refuse a treatment if they believe it violates their beliefs.

Immigration: Anyone who opposes immigration into the US should be deported immediately. If there's any shortage of room in this country, it's for narrow-minded, bigoted, racist dipwads like them.

Indy-car Racing: A bunch of furriners turning left, really really really fast. Yeah, sign me up for that... not.

Islam: The single greatest threat to world peace since communism. Exterminate it now, and free the masses toiling under its yoke. Institutionalized misogyny and racism is not a valid belief system.

Judicial Review: Is for giving new laws a go or no-go, not creating new ones.

K I fully support the eleventh letter of the alphabet.

Lacrosse: I'm with Carlin on this one. Faggot college activity. It used to be a sport, back when it was played by native Americans.

Metric System: WTF, already America? Gonna join the rest of the planet in the new millennium or what?

NASCAR: A bunch of rednecks turning left, really really fast. Oh yeah, sign me right up for that... not.

Nuclear Power: Something to be used as a last resort, in utmost desperation, after exhausting utterly all other possible avenues. The cost of storing spent fuel should be added to the generating costs, and reflected on the customers' bills to properly reflect its real cost.

Nuclear Proliferation: Enough countries have nuclear weapons already. We don't need any more members in the nuclear club, most especially, we do not need backward, beknighted, medieval societies (like any controlled by Islam) getting the bomb. I feel so strongly about this that I would accept the use of nuclear weapons to stop the development of nuclear weapons by a potential new member.

Origami: Sculpting animals and cool shapes with paper? Neato!! I've mastered quite a few shapes myself.

Pharmaceuticals: Specifically, the big multi-nationals that make all the pills. Heh, didja see the movie 'Fight Club'? You know at the end, how they blow up all the credit card company buildings, and supposedly wipe everyone's slates clean'? Yeah, well, swap out the credit card companies for the pharmaceuticals, and swap out early in the morning when no one's in them for 'right in the middle of the stockholder's meeting when they give out the quarterly report on how much they screwed everyone over for', and that's my opinion of them. The researchers? Oh, you silly silly fools, the researchers aren't there. They're not even in special buildings devoted to research. They're doctors working on stipends (and parsimonious stipends at that) experimenting on their patients in hospitals (waivers all signed nice and legal like, don't you doubt it). Most of the pharmaceutical's R&D costs are footed by John Q Taxpayer.

Q I'm not really sure we need the 17th letter of the alphabet, 'Kw' seems to cover it nicely. Also, the character on ST Jr. was kinda 'the ghey'. Not so much the actor, as the role itself.

Reality TV: Needs to be outlawed, abolished, and thoroughly put to a stop, preferably last year. I turn my TV on to escape reality, not to immerse in it. If I want reality on TV, I'll watch CNN, dammit.

Republicans: AKA Money-Grublicans. Thouroughly despicable bastards. Excellent problem-solving abilities, but only interested in solving problems getting money into their pockets, or those of their campaign contributors. Will gladly lie, cheat, steal, or sell their own mother into slavery for a percentage.

Role-playing Games: Something kids should be encouraged to play, since sitting at a table doing math and reading is highly prefereable to shooting up drugs, knocking up fellow teens, or doing drive-by shootings. People strongly opposed to RPGs on the basis that they are bad for kids need to be euthanised, or at bare minimum sterilised.

Soccer: A legitimate sport, as a ball is involved, but a really lame one since you can't use your hands.

Tennis: An excellent sport when played by attractive women in short skirts and tight tops who grunt a lot, otherwise exceedingly dull. Used to be great when John McEnroe and Bjorn Bjorg went at it, but those days are long gone.

United Nations, The: When was the last time they made a situation, like, ANY situation, better instead of worse? And was that done in time to prevent the worst parts of its bad side? A worthless institution, that exists in its current form to facilitate internation corruption more than cooperation. Evict them from Manhattan, and rent the building out as office space.

Vampires: Wouldn't want to be one. I don't handle the sight of blood very well, so I just don't think it's a lifestyle I'm cut out for.

'W': Why wait for 2008? Impeach the prick now!!

X: Far more useful as a symbol than a letter. Still marks the spot, though.

Y: Because we like you!!

Zombies: I think I'm pretty well prepared for a slow zombie apocalypse, mentally speaking. I've also got a nice set of swords to hack em up with. Hoping really hard for the slow zombies. Whoever thought up fast zombies needs to be beaten hard with a shovel. If we get fast zombies, I'm just gonna die.

This just in...

...I'm not dead. Whatever virus invaded my bio-systems is currently being routed into my lympatic system for a good old fashioned ass-whuppin by my white cells.

Hmmm...

Awful quiet around here.

In other news, is it just me, or am I some kind of freako?

The last few posts here have wandered all over the left-right spectrum... hard-core fundy 'famulee VAILyews', tree-hugging greenie, more hard-core fundy Bible thumping, then some leftist Rush-bashing, titled in a manner reminiscent of my Moore-bashing thread earlier...

Am I schizophrenic? Multiple-personality-enabled? On the dope?

Well, none of the above, really. I consider myself to be a moderate extremist. Maybe a better term would be radical centrist. A hard-right left-winger? Leftist conservative? Fundie Libber? Neocon tree-hugger?

Elena the Revelator

10 And the third angel blew his trumpet. And a great star burning as a lamp fell from heaven, and it fell upon a third of the rivers and upon the fountains of waters. 11 And the name of the star is called Wormwood. And a third of the waters turned into wormwood, and many of the men died from the waters, because these had been made bitter.

Do any of you happen to know the Ukranian word for 'Wormwood'? This lady knows it well. I cannot strongly enough suggest that you spend hours perusing her site, and thoroughly re-educate yourself about the greatest ecological disaster the world has ever seen, and remind yourself that it is still going on, as we go about our lives.

It will be 600 years before what's already been poisoned is safe enough to live on again, minimum. And that assumes that the hastily-constructed, now-deteriorating 'sarcophagus', or radiation shroud that shields the core remains intact throught those six long centuries. Part of it was temporarily removed for a few hours to make repairs, and the radiation levels in Kiev, on the good side, the side upwind from the core, rose by 100%.

The word? The Ukranian word for 'Wormwood'?

Chernobyl. Can it really only be a coincidence? Or are we to believe the official death toll of 56, and scoff at the idea that 'a third' of the men died of drinking those bitter waters?

Don't you dare forget. 21 years this April 26th. The kids in this country (USA) that will legally be able to drink this year have a lot of catching up to do, if they mean to put away as much vodka as the bitter, sad, men, women, and children of Ukraine and Belorus.

"What sort of light is that?" -- unnamed Soviet government official, in a helicopter over the site hours after the explosion.

"That... is the light of death." -- Valery Legasov

Kiev is 155 miles south of Chernobyl. 100% increase. A few hours.

How the Dems can win my vote, and why it will never happen

Right now, as better men than I have stated, the Democratic Party stands upon the edge of a knife. On the one side, they could go forward and dismantle the engine of war profiteering and death and sacrificing of America's national reputation for dollars, or, as seems their intent, they can take the controls of that machine, and drive us into war with Iran, a war that seems all too likely to include the use of 'tactical' nuclear weapons.

I hereby add my voice to the chorus begun by my betters. I call on (this Democratic majority)Congress to:

1) Rescind the following dictatorial powers granted to the president:
a) 2001 Authorization for Use of Military Force
b) Military Commissions Act (AKA the 'Torture Bill')
c) War Authorization Resolution of 2002

2) Immediately pass a resolution in strongest possible language making an unsanctioned attack upon Iran a clear violation of the War Powers Act, and thereby an immediately impeachable offense...

3) ...and draft articles of impeachment for said impeachment immediately, and make them public, so there is no ambiguity in anyone's eyes that it is Congress' actual intent to dismantle this engine of war and death and greed, rather than merely control it themselves after the 2008 elections.

Congress: I implore you, for once, pull your greedy snouts out of the trough and look around you. Yes, you can take up the controls of that machine, and you can line your pockets with the gold it conjures from the blood of young American men and the bodies of foreign civilians. But it is wrong to do so, and the wrongness has gone on too long while you wrung your hands, not with compassion for the machine's victims, but envy for the gold it produced that you were not getting.

You are the Democrats. You're the ones that are supposed to be above all this. Prove it. My vote is low-hanging fruit. Take it in exchange for the ill-gotten blood money that a decent man would eschew.

Or, you know, prove yourselves to be not even the flip-side of the Republican's coin, but rather, the exact same image, stamped upon the exact same mettle.

Prejudiced, narrow-minded, and bigoted.

"A prejudiced, narrow minded, bigoted religion that insists it is the ONLY truth, but, you know, regrets the necessity, is still a prejudiced, narrow minded, bigoted religion, and that's exactly what I dislike about modern day conservatism, too." --Highlander, referring to Christianity in general.


Christianity is prejudiced: (most apropos definitions pasted below)
–noun
1. an unfavorable opinion or feeling formed beforehand or without knowledge, thought, or reason.
3. unreasonable feelings, opinions, or attitudes, esp. of a hostile nature, regarding a racial, religious, or national group.

Prejudiced, might I ask, against what? Definition one is inapplicable. Knowledge, thought and reason are part and parcel of the disapproval God passed down upon sin of any kind. He has ultimate knowledge, being the Creator of this universe. Or, is it definition three that you are applying here? You don't like the unfavorable opinions that God has of certain things, so you label these opinions as prejudiced. IE, 'prejudiced' is the word you use to describe God's unfavorable opinions, because you find them unfavorable. And you know, honestly, you can't even fall on definition three, since a Christian isn't supposed to be hostile to anyone. "Love the sinner, hate the sin."

Furthermore, to be 'prejudiced', such opinions or feelings must not only be unfavorable or hostile, they must also be unreasonable. Having an unfavorable opinion of some action because your religion or belief system regards it as bad is not unreasonable. Of course, a religion or belief system that regards members of a race or nation as bad for no other reason than their membership in such groups is unreasonable, that's racism or nationalism. For religions to regard each other unfavorably is not and cannot be construed as prejudice. Differing beliefs that conflict with each other pretty much have to contest each other.

Now it's pretty clear that the 'Christians' you are talking about are hate-fed, hate-fuelled, hate-filled, prejudiced, narrow-minded, bigoted people holding signs outside gay bars that read: 'God Hates Fags', and go around 'defending life' by bombing abortion clinics. Why is it that everyone but atheists can see the scare-quotes around 'Christians' as it applies to these people?


Christianity is narrow-minded:
–adjective
2. not receptive to new ideas; having a closed mind.
3. extremely conservative and morally self-righteous.

Well, here you sort of have a case. Christians should be understandably wary of anything that conflicts with the rules God has passed down, and that would make outsiders view them as closed-minded. But there is a difference between a closed mind that rejects things without consideration, and a mind that considers them first, and rejects them based on whether or not they conflict with one's conscience. If Christians were not receptive to new ideas, the Bible would still being laboriously copied by hand by monks slowly going blind in monasteries lit by torches. Right now, the Bible is being rattled off in over 60 languages by the most advanced multi-lingual printing press in the world, located in Brooklyn, at the Watchtower Bible andTract Society. It's such a new idea it's patented.

"Extremely conservative" is only a negative connotation if you happen to be a liberal, and is a matter of taste more than anything else. The lexicographer is showing his bias here. Talk about irony. Now, 'morally self-righteous', that does describe a lot of people professing to be Christian. But look at them. Pedophile priests, womanizing televangelists, holier-than-thou bigots, do you think any of these people represent Jesus Christ? And the people that follow them, well, monkey see monkey do, eh?


Christianity is bigoted:
adjective
utterly intolerant of any creed, belief, or opinion that differs from one's own.

Ok. That seems like a fair cop. But given that creeds, beliefs, and opinions that vary with Jehovah's are roads to destruction (and many of them believe likewise of each other and of Christianity), you can hardly expect me to believe that in this context, 'bigoted' is at all negative. In this context, 'bigotry' is a virtue. And also... 'one's own'? As in, something some guy just decided to believe? Please. This is the singular form of belief, to which a negative word like bigotry can actually be applied.

A religion is larger than those who practice it. Bigotry is a human attribute. Belief systems are neccessarily exclusive. If you believe A, and A not B, then you cannot also believe B. 'Bigoted' cannot be applied to any religion, only to those who follow it, and only if their intolerance is based on something other than their beliefs. If all members of a religion believe 'A', and 'A' precludes 'B', you cannot call them bigoted for refusing to believe 'B'. If you can prove 'B' to be true, then feel free to beat them over the head with that.


Understand that a religion is not one man that follows it, nor is any man that follows it that religion itself. Prejudiced, Narrow-minded, and Bigoted are terms that cannot be applied to belief systems, only to individuals. You may not like a particular belief system. You may not like the people who follow it. You will encounter many belief systems that conflict with your own (and you do have one). But if you decide that all the people who follow (or profess to follow) a particular reasonable (sic) belief system are bad because they follow (or profess to follow) that belief system, see the above definitions.

Mind you, modern-day conservatism sucks.

Ah, Love!!

Below is an excerpt from an e-mail I sent to someone with relationship troubles. I happened to be going through some old e-mails, and saw it, and thought it was some pretty good writing, or something, and thought I'd share it. I have a vague, uneasy feeling that maybe I already have, perhaps on an older blog. If so, well, too bad.

So I know what I'm talking about when I say that I've been handed the short end of the stick in love. I've been crushed, I've been humiliated, I've had my heart ripped out of my chest and shoved where the sun don't shine. It's never easy, it always hurts, but it does get better. Not always fast, probably not even to 100% of what it was before, but it does get better.

Hell, my heart's been broke so many times now it's more tape and glue than original pieces. But I keep on going, because someday, I might just meet someone that will trade their taped, glued, bundle of heart-shards for mine, and we can spend of the rest of our days putting each other's hearts back together.

I know she's out there, somewhere. It's just a matter of time.

Love is giving your heart to someone, totally. Letting them into the deepest corners of your most carefully hidden heart. Giving them the keys to your happy place. You do it because you want them to always be there, and feel as welcome in your heart as you want to feel in theirs. But if they throw a big party, knock holes in the walls, and throw up in the pool and basically wreck the joint, you just have to change the locks, clean up, and start all over again. And it does get harder to give the keys to someone else, but still you do it, because one day you'll find the person willing to give you the keys to theirs, and they'll be as nervous as you are about the new plaster over the holes in their walls.

It's why we never give up. Because being let into that place, by the person you've let into yours, is the closest we'll ever get to heaven on earth. Love is the only thing worth having, and the only present worth giving. It's the only thing that can last forever that comes from another person. It's waiting for us all, if we're able to find it. So don't stop looking. It's out there somewhere. I'm sure of it.

So, yeah. Some of it may sound kind of corny, but hey, in the corn soldier army, I'm a Kernel.

Why I think Rush Limbaugh should be dropped on Michael Moore from a bomber.

First off, watch this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EX5KymB4Y_g&NR

Now this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5INPn9lCNp4&NR

Now, it was mentioned in the spots, but Fox's jerky movements were not caused by the disease itself, and exacerbated by not taking medication, but by the medication itself.

Limbaugh is one of the more wretched excuses for truly bilious vile inhuman cruelty.


Now, there's something else that was mentioned in those spots, and it hit me like a ton of lead.

MJF: (sic) "These fetal cells are coming from the leftover cells of in-vitro fertilization procedures; they're going to be destroyed anyways." (italics mine)

Up to now, I have opposed using fetal stem cells for research because I had been led to believe that these cells were coming from abortion victims (about 98% of whom I regard as murder victims, since their mothers were in no danger), or from embreyos created for the express purpose of then ghoulishly killing them and harvesting their cells.

If what he said is true, and I can't think of any good reason for it not to be true, then using these leftover cells for stem cell research is not only not morally questionable, but failing to use these cells for said reasearch is a malignant waste of life.

Let me explain (more to myself honestly):

In vitro fertilization is used when a couple can't conceive normally, but the mother can bear children. The process requires harvesting a number of sperm and egg cells from the prospective parents. The purpose of this procedure is to create life. That's important. To me. (If the procedure doesn't take place, no babies will be born at all to the couple. All of their sperm and eggs will go to waste.) The sperm and eggs are mixed, and in the process, several or maybe even all of the eggs are fertilized. The fertilized eggs are then placed in growth solutions, and one that appears hardy is selected and an implantation is attempted. The rest are frozen or otherwise stored, in case the first attempt fails. Once there is a successful outcome, the remaining embreyos are discarded.

Discarded. Thrown away. Tossed out and left to rot. Killed for no purpose. Their lives are wasted. Even though they could be used to create technology to save other lives. That is just wrong. And now there are people are coming along and saying: 'Let us use these embreyos to find cures for diseases that afflict and kill millions each year.'

Pro-lifers, brothers, fellow Christians, hear me. We have been misled. Stem cell research is not causing the deaths of the unborn, it is giving those deaths, and the short lives that preceded them, meaning. If we truly care about the unborn, then let us also care about those who will be born with genetic predispositions to diabetes, Parkinson's, ALS, Alzheimer's, and other maladies that these wasted lives could help cure.

Ask yourself this, while you're asking yourself 'Would I want to be aborted?': 'If I knew I was going to die, but I had the choice of dying to no purpose, or dying to save or improve the lives of millions, how would I choose?' We all know how Jesus chose, when faced with that question. There is no morally valid reason to oppose stem-cell research of in vitro leftovers. They are going to die regardless. Let them at least have a meaningful death.


"And the truth shall set them free"